gaeln (gaeln) wrote,

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my brain is migraine-soaked still, I'm bi-lingual in my dreams

Me and my migraines, we got a thing goin' on
See, we've always had this understanding, my migraines and I, this way of dealing with each other, a way to play fair that's worked well enough lo these many years. First it affects one side of my brain for a day or two, then it affects the other of my brain also for a day or two and then, it goes the fuck away. Just away. That would my, and its, understanding of its side of the deal.

My understanding of my side of the deal? Well, my understanding is basically that I won't shoot myself, literally or figuratively, or slam my head into some conveniently located wall or whatever, and thereby deny it its ability to affect first one side my brain and then...the other. Simple, right?

Except that there's weeks like this week where fair play goes right out the window and, well, this week just sucked...sucky sucky sucky such as it is. First one side, then the other, then back again and and THEN back again and THAT, my friends, just isn't fair. We have a DEAL. An UNDERSTANDING. I feel betrayed, at its mercy and I HATE that. Yet, I know that this too will pass. Hopefully by tomorrow because that would be nice. Wouldn't that be nice? Sure that would be nice. Nice nice nice.

Although I do have this irrational fear that one day I will get a headache that will never go away. And seriously, that would be such a drag. There is hope though because, apparently, neuroscience is On The Case. Thus far,though, their meds only have made things get even more out of control but, who knows, right? Who really knows? Could happen.

In other news
I had this dream-- probably the first I've remembered at all in months -- where I was at work, in the kids section of Barnes & Noble. This woman starts chattering away at me about how she needs a book about vowels so she can teach them to her kid. I'm already imagining which book would probably be the best still, I have questions, I always have questions and as I'm starting to ask these seemingly pertinent questions, I suddenly realize that she's talking to me and  I'm talking back to her in German. German? I know very little as in Very Little German but in my dream, I am fluent. Naturally, as soon as I discovered my new found ability, I woke up and *sigh* it was gone. Still, I have my numbers one through ten and even being awake can't take that away from me.
Tags: personal

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